I MADE it...i think?

Hello beauties. WHO'd have thunk that this musician would make her way across to Substack. I truly didn't....YET HERE I AM soooo let me tell you why!

Jul 16, 2023

a musician on a writers app???

When i first started seeing Substack pop off i assumed that it was for writers only, and in all honesty i have had this belief that i am not a good writer LOL. I have carried that narrative around with me for most of my life….even thou i’m a reasonably accomplished singer-songwriter ….try make that conundrum make sense.

Why this, why now

I watched as my best friends started sharing their inner musings on here and the community they were creating and i had this feeling of "FOMO”, i think. I miss the deeper and consistent connections that i used to have on instagram, but as the app has evolved, the algorithms have done there thing and long form content kinda died, so it felt like i was sharing my art to no one.

I missed having a space where those that love what i create and resonate with what i have to say and sing DON’T ACTUALLY MISS ANYTHING that i’m sharing. So i went hunting on here to see if other musicians were able to make this platform work for them….and let me tell you…i struck GOLD.

I saw as other composers like myself were able to share their unique art here in a way that felt empowering and community building. I MISS being able to share my music in a way that doesn’t mean i only have the option of releasing it on Spotify or for it to get lost on instagram.

I want to make music more consistently again.

I want to give myself permission to explore my craft in a less serious way…kinda like a musical diary, and yet still share it with the world in a more contained and personal way.

I want to create a space where you can watch me perform for you from anywhere in the world (thats right i’m talking high quality audio monthly streamed gigs by yours TRULY straight into your ears).

I just want more creative freedom here……..

SPEAKING OF CREATIVE FREEDOM

When i was pregnant and desperately trying to find my way out of the mental choke hold a HG pregnancy had on me i started setting myself 60minutes to write and record an all vocal soundscape. I released on insta and it did the rounds and then it did what all posts do and disappeared from circulation.

This was the first one i finished…and aptly enough i called it CREATIVE COCOON….

it feels only right for it to be my first offering to you all.

1×

0:00

-2:30

BUT GUESS WHAT I wont just be singing ….

As a lot of you know my art over the last few years has been inspired by my hellfire journey in motherhood. When i say that 2020-2022 were the toughest most gruelling years of my life to date, pandemic NOT included, I truly mean it.

I didn’t know that parenthood could look like it did for us and i genuinely wish i had seen or read different parenting experiences, because for a hot minute there ours was truly so ROUGH.

The day i found out i was pregnant (even thou he was consciously conceived) my world as i knew it BOMBEDDDD…and then, the day i gave birth my world that i’d pieced back together over 42 weeks BLEW up….and yet, i clawed my way back to this place, right here, right now…happier and more fulfilled then ever.

When i was in the thick of it with Fergus i held onto the words and stories other mothers with similar experiences who were out the other side had shared.

This is the other aspect of what i want to offer you here. My incredibly personal and vulnerable journey and the lessons i’ve learnt through a HG pregnancy, birth and my first 2years of parenting. to say the least a 300 word limit on an insta post caption just didn’t cut it.

SOOOO here i am….warts and all

EXPECT IMPERFECTION here…

ENJOY my artistic expression here

and Thankyou for joining me.

I truly appreciate it.

Enjoy a few very personal images of my life over the last few years…lol if i had photos that reflected the carnage of the last few years id share them however the camera never came out when i was in a flood of tears thinking my life had ended haha